


How to Trick A Goddess

by horrible_memes



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-04-20
Packaged: 2019-04-25 14:44:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14380818
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/horrible_memes/pseuds/horrible_memes
Summary: Lup helps Taako disguise himself as Lup so he can sneak into the Astral Plane and see Magnus. Then Kravitz shows up.





	How to Trick A Goddess

   “Is this really what you wear on a daily basis?”

   “It’s called fashion, dipshit. Look it up.”

   “Look, all I’m saying is that you could wear something that didn’t look like it came from the bargain bin of Fantasy Goodwill.”

   Taako stood in front of a full-body mirror, with Lup standing behind him, brush and fantasy hairspray in hand. She poked and prodded at her brother’s hair, styling it to look like hers, matching the outfit that Taako was uncomfortably pulling at. Taako winced as the brush got caught in a particularly sizeable knot.

   “Why don’t I just magic my hair to look like yours?” Taako asked, rubbing his head.

   Lup scoffed. “You can’t get beauty like this through magic, bro. It’s gotta come naturally.” Taako sighed. 

   After several minutes, Lup stepped back, looking at Taako through the mirror, and nodded. “It looks better on me, but it’s not bad.” Taako looked up and down at himself in the mirror and smiled. He and Lup were hard to tell apart on most days, but thanks to Lup’s help, the two were almost identical. 

   “Alright. I’ll be the first to admit. I owe you one.” Taako smiled, leaning in to hug Lup. 

   “Yes, you do.” Lup smiled, giving Taako a wink. “We’ll discuss that later.”

   “You’re sure you’re okay with this?” Taako asked.

   Lup shrugged. “Yeah, why not? Pretty sure I’ve pissed off worse things than-” The distinctive sound of a portal being sliced open cut the twins’ conversation off. As the two quickly swiveled their heads to find the source, they saw a tall, slim, well-dressed man step through, dusting off his coat.

   “Hey, babe. Sorry I’m late, got held up at work,” Kravitz sighed as his face morphed from a skeleton to its usual handsome form. “A whole cult of necromancers were trying to revive some ancient-” Kravitz paused as he saw Lup and Taako, looking almost identical, standing next to a large mirror. He tilted his head. “...Lup? What are you and Taako…doing?”

   Taako forced a chuckle out of his mouth. “Oh, Lup was, uh… tomorrow is Twins Day down at my school, and I wanted to…”

   “...To have some fun with the students.” Lup quickly chimed in. “We wanna see how well they can tell us apart.”

   “Taako, tell me the truth. It doesn’t even seem like it’s anything bad, but your and Lup’s behavior just…” Kravitz sighed. “I’m not mad at you. I know, possibly more than anyone, that you have a habit of getting yourself in over your head, and I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

   Taako reached to pull his hat down over his face before realizing that it was taken off over an hour ago. “Alright fine… We were… I was… planning on disguising myself as Lup and sneaking into the Astral Plane to see Magnus. I know what you’re thinking. ‘Why is Taako getting so emotional about someone else?’ And that’s fair. But…” Taako sighed, desperately trying to hold back tears. “Look, I don’t… I’m not the best at handling loss, okay?” Lup raised her hand to speak, but quickly lowered it.

   Kravitz stood still, silently going over the information in his mind. He looked up at Taako and opened his mouth to speak, but could not find the words. He tried again, taking a deep breath, but the words once again fail him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath before looking up at Taako. “Taako…” He sighed. “This… this breaks so many rules of death.”

   Taako slumped on to a nearby chair. “Look, I didn’t think this plan through, alright? It’s just that… Magnus is… was my friend and I wanted to see him one last time.” Lup leaned down and rubbed Taako’s shoulder, who brushed it off. 

   “I’m sorry babe, but…” Kravitz said, rubbing the back of his neck. “I can’t let this happen.” Taako dropped his head into his hand, and Lup quickly sat down next to him. Kravitz sighed and stroked his chin before smiling. “...At least, not without my help.” Taako quickly looked up.

   “The Raven Queen isn't going to be convinced by a simple costume change,” Kravitz said, sitting down next to his husband. “She is the Goddess of Death.” Taako chuckled. “No matter how good your impression is, she’s gonna be able to sense your living soul the moment you enter the astral plane.”

   “You got that Magic Jar spell or whatever, right?” Lup said. “That could do it.”

   “Definitely. I’ll bring your soul through and touch it up, so it’s more believable.” Kravitz said.

   Taako stared bewildered at Kravitz. “You’d… you’d actually help me lie to The Raven Queen?” 

   Kravitz smiled warmly and shrugged. “I’ve broken a lot of rules to help you and your crew out. What’s one more?”

   Taako smiled and chuckled before grabbing a nearby rag and dabbed at his eyes. “Fuck you I’m gonna ruin my fucking eyeliner.” Kravitz and Lup laughed and helped Taako to his feet. Lup gave her brother a crushing bearhug, and Kravitz quickly brought Taako in for an embrace.

   “Alright,” Kravitz said, summoning his scythe. “Let’s go trick a goddess.”

  
  



End file.
